I’ve long been a fan of the Shazam text service (2580) and when I’m drunk and out clubbing it’s one of my most dialed numbers as i identify music to later download to my mp3 player.
So when I heard about the AQA and 82ASK text services (ask them a question and they have experts to look up the answer and text you back), I thought I’d give them a try, but needed a suitable question:
AQA let you choose a free question from a list on their site, so as a pre-test test, I asked them:
Q: Will I get lucky tonight?
A: You will get lucky tonight if you are confident, generous & lower your standards sufficiently.
Which I guess makes sense, but doesn’t really give a definitive answer. For my actual test question I need something a bit more solid…
So, following on from my 2003 scientific experiment, I texted both numbers with:
Q: In a fight between an unarmed ninja and a tiger, who would win?
Here’s what they said:
AQA: In a fight between an unarmed ninja and a tiger, AQA thinks the tiger would win. Unarmed the ninja would be defenceless against the tigers raw power.
82ASK: Without weapons a tiger would be most likely to win. An adult male tiger weighs a massive 310kg and has a deadly claw swipe and razor bite.
in conclusion: pfft,
it’s already been established scientifically by me that a ninja (monk) would beat a tiger (leopard). And I don’t charge £1 for the info either.
Altho it did give me an idea for future blogs, if you need any questions answering by the application of scientific process, add them here as comments and I’ll see what i can do, scientifically.
Your 2003 scientific experiment was seriously flawed because you used a leopard rather than a tiger as your opponent. There is also some While leopards are formidable felines, adult (especially male) tigers are considerably larger and more dangerous. You said yourself at the time that a lion was not an advisable opponent but tigers are actually larger and stronger than lions, so the answer from those answer services was probably correct.
Typical adult male sizes and weights-
Leopard: 6ft long, 140lb (much lighter/slender than a lion or tiger)
Lion: 7ft long, 400lb
Tiger: 9ft long, 600lb
If you’d have trouble with a lion, a fully-grown male tiger would rip you to shreds.
I did find the stats in a copy of the DMG and the difference between the critical stats of a Leopard, Lion, and Tiger is quite telling, and these aren’t even considering the special grapple attacks they can do:
Hit Dice: 3d8+6 (19hp), 5d8+10 (32hp), 6d8+18 (45hp)
AC: 15, 15, 14
Base Attack/Grapple: +2/+5, +3/+12, +4/+14
Attack: Bite +6 melee (1d6+3), Claw +7 melee (1d4+5), Claw +9 melee (1d8+6)
Full Att: Bite +6 melee (1d6+3) and 2 Claws +1 melee (1d3+1), 2 Claws +7 melee (1d4+5) and Bite +2 melee (1d8+2), 2 Claws +9 melee (1d8+6) and Bite +4 melee (2d6+3)
Saves: F+5 R+7 W+2, F+6 R+7 W+2, F+8 R+7 W+3
Abilities: S16 D19 C15 I2 W12 Ch6, S21 D17 C15 I2 W12 Ch6, S23 D15 C17 I2 W12 Ch6
Challenge Rating: 2, 3, 4
Approx size: 4ft/120lb, 7ft/440lb, 9ft/500lb (which is more or less correct)
Oooh, see how much more powerful those attacks were with the tiger over those of the lion and especially leopard? And those extra hitpoints aren’t going to make it easier to defeat.
You might be able to fight a leopard unarmed (hehehe, in your dreams), but a lion is a totally different proposition, and a tiger is another at least as large step up. In fact given the sheer size and strength of a tiger, I doubt even the best ninja would stand a chance without a weapon, and even then only with a particularly good weapon, like a machine-gun 
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Actually it looks like you need a decider. Why not try Brainiac!