Nine people staying in a remote cottage • surrounded by dark woods • no contact with the outside world • a strange local landlord • noises in the night • mutilated livestock • getting lost in the woods after midnight • boarded up buildings • sabotaged vehicles • warnings of beasts afoot at night • stumbling into a gypsy camp • people being found unconscious • mysterious army vehicle abandoned nearby • local police ignoring requests for help • suspicious locals • a nearby village that doesn’t show up on the map • a scary clown • moonless nights…
Nope not the new horror film from Wes Craven
That was an entirely accurate description of my weekend
no punchline ... every word is true!
Was a Very drunken weekend with mates 
Next entry: I'm a ninJA ffs
Previous entry: literally
That’s great, you must have had an excellent time
Was this a holiday with friends, or a “motivational weekend” management decided to put you through?
Even if it was the latter, not finding Daffyd (Little Britain) in some village pub must have been a disappointment. Either way it sounds like you enjoyed it and I’m sure it was a good character building exercise.